Saturday, June 22, 2013

Brow Art

I've heard of Abstract Art, Cubism, Expressionism, Fauvism, Impressionism, Modern Art, Pointillism, Pop Art, Postimpressionism, Primitivism, Realism, Surrealism ... most of which I known nothing about.  But I'm proud to announce I've come upon a new art form which is blossoming in the shopping malls of the United States.

It's amazing and while it is unlikely to replace any of these other forms, it will add a new form of "living" or "performance" art (forms I failed to mention in the above's just too much! I can't remember all this stuff!) Brow Art was first discovered by myself at the Oaks Mall in Gainesville, Florida. Because Gainesville is the home of the University of Florida, I assumed Brow Art had initially been uncovered by an archaeologist from the university working in Peru. That's probably not true but I was too lazy to check it out.

Brow Art, for the uninitiated, which most likely includes all males above the age of one month, involves women being strapped into a chair in a salon-like setting whereupon an "artist" of the brow commences to craft a work of art from the woman's eyebrows. Needless to say, this takes an immense amount of skill and I've been told confidentially by a female friend that it can also involve a certain amount of pain. It the brow artist is competent, however, the gain is worth the pain, for the woman can walk out of that salon with head held high (actually she has to hold her head up high to hold the brow art in place) and strut through the mall, the envy of all other women who have yet to find the right brow artist. Some women, the unplucked, as they are known, have been seen running from the mall in tears, vowing to return to have their own brows artistically rearranged asap!

Fortunately for the women of Ocala, there is now a Brow Art Salon in Ocala's Paddock Mall! Call today to make your appointment with a Brow Art artiste.